Early this morning my husband showed me a video from a game in the Little League World Series. He said to me, “Check this out, it’s good for your blog showing how children sometimes have better emotional capacity than adults”. Besides being so grateful that my husband has bought into the concept of conscious parenting and my Do Overs method, the video warmed my heart. The video shows a Little League World Series Game where the players are ~12 years old. The pitcher accidentally hit the batter in the head with a pitch knocking him to the ground. Thankfully after a few minutes the batter was fine and able to walk to 1stbase. The batter from 1st base seeing that the pitcher was visibly upset and shaken called a time out, walked over to the pitcher’s mound and hugged the pitcher.
In a similar major league baseball game, it’s not unusual for a mis-directed pitch to hit the batter on the arm or side. It’s also not unusual for the batter to then toss the bat onto the ground and storm the pitcher’s mound in anger with his teammates ready to back him up. This video I am referencing validates that children have a lot to teach adults.
I would like to think that both children in the little league game grew up in households of forgiveness and conscious parenting. The batter was physically and emotionally resilient to bounce up and stay in the game. He then had the awareness to look outside of himself, notice how upset the pitcher was, and feel the need to console him. The fact that the pitcher was so upset for accidentally hurting his opponent also shows his compassion on a human level. Watching this video gives me hope that by embracing the conscious parenting method which focuses on awareness, resilience and self-regulation, future generations will naturally be less angry, less addicted to misery, and display more acts of kindness across the board.
For parents: Children under the age of 6 are naturally loving and kind. They are then domesticated by generations of parenting and by their friends with their own generations of parenting. Some parents would just say to this pitcher, shrug it off and move on, and think that he does have what it takes to be a great baseball player. This is the typical traditional style of parenting where the attachment to the outcome is more important to the attachment of the process. If our children are as talented as we think they are in a sport or academics, they will rise to the top regardless of their coach, teammates, or teacher.
If your children are old enough, have them watch this 1 min 44 sec video and ask them for their views on it to open the discussion of compassion and kindness. You might learn about some things going on in their lives. Open discussions are fantastic and it’s great to share your feelings and a situation when you were younger feeling vulnerable.
I ask this without passing any judgment. Is it your instinct to feel the pitcher is weak because he felt bad and probably does not have what it takes to be a great baseball player? A great discussion, but take a moment to dig inside and ask yourself why this is so? Again, no judgement. Did your parent(s) put pressure on you to win at all costs? How did this make you feel at the time? Do you associate losing with being weak? If you get angry, do you have trouble releasing it quickly? Do you need to blame someone else and get payback? These are all typical reactions for many people. It’s all over the news in politics and with the school shootings. Regardless which channel you watch, the blame is just swayed differently but the anger and inability to work together is clear. Hopefully our children will do a better job in the future when it’s their turn.
If this topic resonates with you, there is also a fantastic book called “The Book of Forgiveness” written by Desmond and Mpho Tutu that taught me so much about tolerance. Each chapter is loaded with exercises to release anger and work on giving and allowing ourselves to receive forgiveness.
I am here with my Do Overs method if you need help giving or receiving forgiveness, and to bring acceptance and tolerance into your life.
~Andi
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